Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Day 293

Day 293
Monday, March 10, 2014
Physical:
This was a very odd day.  After his bath, DH wanted extra covers, and went back to sleep.  He didn’t wake up until after 1:00.  I took him his pills and drink; but he seemed to have a hard time taking the pills.  I ended up putting the last few in his hand, one by one.  He seemed like it was either hard or confusing to put them into his mouth.  He did eventually get them; and then I took him a cinnamon twirl to eat while he finished his drink.  I had turned the TV on, and he wanted me to lay his head back down but leave the TV on. 
He went right back to sleep and didn’t wake up until after 5:00.  When I took him supper, he acted groggy.  But most odd was that instead of talking to me, he kept using hand gestures.  He ate very little of his dinner, and later told me (remarkably clearly) that he knew I wouldn’t want to hear it but there was a cooked roach on his plate.  Regardless of my poor vision, I’m 99.99% sure there was not!  But, possibly he could have found a small piece of potato skin.  And he often *thinks* he sees different type of bugs/spiders/critters in his room (and I’m told that kind of “hallucination” is not uncommon in dementia).
Since he had eaten so little, I took him another protein drink (chocolate milk) at bedtime.  He took about 2 sips to take a pill .. and then held the glass for an hour.  When I took his last pills, and realized he was still holding the glass, I tried to ask why.  He was not talking clearly, and told me his arm was “stuck”.  In the end I pried the glass out of his hand, and gave him a cup of juice.  He didn’t drink that until I put it into the other hand … and then he drank the entire cup of juice~
WhenI told him “good night” and turned out all the lights, he didn’t respond – and he usually does. 
He went right to sleep.  The alarm went off around midnight .. he had gotten the tube smashed up under him … and when I fixed it and got the machine going again, he made the comment “that sure will wake you up won’t it” .. and was snoring again before I was 5 steps away!
This morning (Tuesday) he didn’t wake up at all until I had to wake him up when the CAN got here. She said he was less responsive than usual .. she would have to ask him several times to do something that he had been doing (such as turn over, raise your arm) without being told.  She also noted … and have no idea if it means anything or not .. that his underarm odor is back.  I’ve always thought that was related to some of his meds; she says *something* has changed, but she doesn’t know what either.
People:
The CAN came as usual about 7:30.
Emotions:
It was a strange day.  Physically it was not hard, other than when I had to try to push DH’s feet away from the footboard.   The pad that slides well was in the wash.  My back aches today from pushing; but the “good” pad is now back on the bed.  Emotionally, the day was a bit draining.  Besides being totally bored, DH’s change in behavior was unnerving.  The CAN this morning also noticed subtle changes.    He seemed unresponsive .. but the big question is, has his mind turned some sort of corner into a different dimension?  Or has he settled into an attitude of uncooperation because I’m annoying him (maybe he’s mad at being in bed all day, though I really don’t think that’s it).  It’s almost like he’s just decided not to bother; except I seriously do not think he’s capable of that degree of thought any more. 
I don’t feel weepy (and I’m sure this being the 4th day of warmth and sunshine is helping that!), but I do feel sad.  I don’t know what’s behind the changes goin on.  I can’t tell if it’s a physical change or has to do with the dementia. That also means I don’t know how to respond.
I keep checking email all day.  The one friend I can count on is away from her computer for a few days.   One person who *used* to be my friend doesn’t bother any more.  One other friend doesn’t email because it’s hard for me to read  (well, it is – I have to copy and paste and enlarge; but I do that because I want to read email), but she calls occasionally.
And that’s it.  Well, really, I’m pretty boring these days, so I guess I’m not surprised.  But it’s still pretty lonely.
I guess, as usual, I will spend the day mostly just watching my “routine lineup” of TV shows.  It’s close to 10:00 now, I think .. time for Rachel.  Then a game show.  Then news, and lunch.  The another cooking/talk show I like.  Maybe DH will wake by then. 
After that is another talk show .. if I have anything to do, that’s the time because I find that show faintly annoying.  Sometimes the subjects are interesting; but I don’t like watching shows where people keep trying to “talk over” each other.   Then another game show I like. 

Then the news, and time to take the first steps of setting up dialysis, thinking about supper.  Next thing I know, evening news is coming on, and the day is nearly gone.

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