Day 280

Day 280
Wednesday, February 26, 2014
Physical: 
As far as getting up and down, the day went somewhat like they have been lately.  DH slept until about 11:00.  He said he wanted to sleep more .. but not 5 minutes later he had tossed the covers off and said he was getting up.  He insisted on holding onto one of the blue pads (tried to hold it out of my reach) because, apparently, he thought I wasn’t going to find him any clothes.  That should have been a clue how the day would go!
Mentally, he was a little more confused than normal.  He went back and forth from calling me “mama” all day.  He got it in his head he had left the car at his mama’s house and it wasn’t safe there.; kept insisting I call mama to let her know he was staying at “my house”.  He finally let it go when I told him DSS would get the car and take it to his house.  Somehow, that made sense to him.
He ended up going to bed a little earlier, because he thought he needed to use the bathroom.  He didn’t.  But he fell asleep anyway.
He ate 2 of the chicken tortillas again tonight.  And, I got him to drink 2 of his protein drinks.  
Several times during the day he insisted he could get up and walk.  I can’t even tell if his mind really is that far gone, that he doesn’t know he can’t … or if there’s just some stubbornness going on.  It’s just scary, because I can’t watch him every single minute and I’m always afraid he’ll get hurt trying to get up.  I need a seat belt for his chair!
People:
The CAN came early.  That was all.
Emotions:
Last night (Wednesday) was a bit rough.  He went through a spell of thinking I was his mama again.  And then he was fretting about where he parked the car.  We also went through the daily round of “I’m going to get up” and me trying to explain why he couldn’t.  It’s sad, and some days I’m OK .. other days I get crying spells.  Last night I was pretty tired from moving stuff around in his room (and he hasn’t even noticed the changes, which is a good thing).
I have a friend I’ve known for nearly 50 years.  Sometimes we can go literally years without being in touch.  Right now we’re in a phase of writing 2 or 3 times a day.  That is actually helping a lot .. sort of doesn’t feel so “alone”.  She used to work as a nurse in a rest home, so she understands a lot of my frustration.  And, it’s just nice to be able to say what I feel without being afraid of stomping on toes!!  I do pretty much say what I want here .. that’s the whole point … but occasionally someone misunderstands something I say and gets offended.  I’m sorry about that;  I wish people would just realize that I’m going through a difficult time and need this outlet, and nothing I say is meant to hurt anyone’s feelings.  
The CAN is here now and the nurse will likely be here before the CAN even leaves.  Then I’ll have the rest of the day, hopefully, to get more stuff done on the “great bedroom project”!