Day 256

Day 256

Monday February 3 2014

Physical:

DH slept until noon.  He woke up a itme or two, but didn’t feel ready to get up.   He’d only been up less than 2 hours when the CAN got here, so I told her he needed to stay up.  She had a difficult time with him.  Usually I help her get him in and out of the lift chair, but not on the bed.  She didn’t call me to help get him off the bed and back to the wheelchair; but she told me she wasn’t going to be able to keep doing that much longer.  He’s getting much too hard to move … he has no sense of balance, so thinks he’s falling, and tends to try to lurch.  Usually he goes in the wrong direction.    Plus, he’s just plain too heavy.  When it was time for him to go to bed, it was very difficult getting him from chair to wheelchair ; a small bit less hard getting hm onto the bed.

I really don’t know what’s going to happen when one person (me, since there isn’t anyone else) can no longer get him up and down at all any more.

He ate a sandwich for lunch.  He didn’t want anything, but when I gave it to him he did finally eat it.  He ate a bowl of chili and rice for supper .. but as usual, when I fix rice, he spilled more than he aate I think.  I put a bath towel around his neck as a “bib” when he eats, but he still got rice under it and on his shirt.

I’m noticing more and more that he’s having trouble sitting things down on the table beside him.  I think it’s time to try to find a table that’s a little shorter (this one is just about the same height as the arm of his chair).  He’s constantly dropping things between the chair and the table.   Maybe a shorter table would fit closer to the chair, where he seems to just drop things over the arm.

He didn’t have a very good night again.  He was coughing some; but mostly just couldn’t seem to settle. 

Eople:

The CAN and the supply delivery both came at the same time, in the early afternoon.  So it was a flurry of activity for about an hour .. and then quiet. 

I got a phone call from a girl I went to school with .. not really “related” to DH, but in our conversation I requested that she ask the group (our class has it’s own Yahoo group; plus the school has a web site) for rayers for DH.

Emotions:

Jittery.  Things have been relatively “calm” for awhile; but now it feels like something is subtly changing.  What worries me (scares me?) most right now is the concept of trying to make DH understand that he has to stay in bed because no one is strong enough to get him up and down.  That would be extremely difficult because of the dementia.  He might, at times, be able to grasp the concept; but even if he did he wouldn’t remember.  It has been a few weeks now since he last tried to “force” his way out, by either sliding down and off the end or by throwing his legs over the railing.  He’s never been successful at either; but normally at that point I get him up.   I’m not sure what would happen if I refuse.  I do have the Atavan gell to try if he gets too upset or agitated or angry .. just don’t know how well it will work.

Yesterday morning I was at odds with myself, and no idea why.  Today is better, I think.  I didn’t sleep as well as I’d hoped, but enough anyway.  Except for some phone calls, I’ve gotten done the things on my “Plan”  so far.    I’m not too good with general “clean house” type items on my list.  So I’ve been trying to think of all the specific things I need to do and can get checked off the list.  If I’m busy, and being productive, I’m less likely to have weepy spells.  But no matter what, by evening I’m so exhausted and hurt all over.  I’m trying to figure out ways to make the evening work better.  I’ve started getting out the solution bags for dialysis as soon as I bag up the previous night’s trash.  The boxes are heavy, so doing that step early in the day saves me a hard task later when I’m so tired.  I don’t cook much any more; but when I do, I cook enough for several nights so that all I have to do is heat up something.  DH gets pot pies a lot .. but that’s in part because he likes them,  and often given a choice of several things he will choose the pot pie.  At least it pretends to have some veggies; and the meat in it is more easily digestible for him. 

It’s 10 days to my “break”.   I guess I’m a bit of a pessimist.  I never thought I was .. but I’m so very afraid *something* will happen to cancel that weekend.  It’s February – weather is very unpredictable.  And things happen. 

It’s too early, but I need to go on and get my day started.  The CAN will be early today (Tuesdays and Thursdays she has fewer patients to take care of).  That makes for a longer afternoon; but I’ll just have to find things that I need to do.  Worst comes to worse I can ..*gasp* .. clean a drawer or a closet!!
~~~
Additional note:
I went in to check that the dialysis was done so I could remove the tubing.  DH was awake again, and told me when I left the room to close the door.I asked why (he normally does not want the door closed).  He said he had some animals .. not "real" ones, but electronic ones that act real.  If the door was open they'd get out.
Geesh.
I told him they couldn't get beyond the hall.  He was OK with that.
Where does that stuff come from????