Day 86

Day 86

Sunday, June 22, 2014

My BFF came up with what I consider the perfect phrase to cover all my various mood swings .. “geriatric bipolarism”.  Explains a lot.

Yesterday was a very odd mixture of getting things done and totally lazy.  DN and I did go through the house and make decisions about a lot of things.  Even doing that much helps me to determine what I need to do.    I’m just having a bit of trouble figuring out how to get organized.  It is not helping that the people who bought the table haven’t come back for it.  I’d like to be able to use the table  as a “staging” area .. a place to set boxes so I can sort things as I go.  If they would come get the table, I can up up my folding ones and know they can stay. 

I did manage to get a few more things packed, and some things sorted.  Sometimes the 2 months seem like not nearly enough time … and yet so much can’t really be done very far ahead.

DN’s ride home backed out (and this is MY opinion, which I’m entitled to as well as this blog is a place for my free expression …  regardless of the circumstances, it is wrong to tell someone you will do something and then wait until  they are “stranded” and back out).  Anyway, I asked TGF to take DN home.  I of course had to pay for gas.  And we decided to eat out.  I know, I could have just said no.  But I was hungry too, and we did have fun.  But the whole excursion pretty much wiped out my yardsale profits. L  I did get an advance peek at DN’s apartment (and hopefully when I see it “officially”, in daylight, she’ll have had a chance to do just a little more cleaning, though it really wasn’t too bad). 

I didn’t get home until nearly 10:00.  I went right to bed; and when I woke, I thought it must be time to get up so I turned on the TV.  It took a few minutes to register that news wasn’t on .. so I finally looked at the clock.  It was only 2:00!!  I did get back to sleep, and didn’t get until just before 6:00.  In theory that was nearly 8 hours of sleep.  It sure doesn’t feel like it!

I don’t quite know what I’m doing today.  I’ve dawdled too much this morning, and really need to get a shower and get busy.  I only have 2 boxes left; TGF will try to bring me some this afternoon.  I think maybe this morning I need to concentrate on a little straightening.  A few places (especially the guest room) have gotten cluttered again, and it’s too hard to figure out what needs to be done.  So, I guess that’s the morning plan at least.  Perhaps in the afternoon I’ll get TGF to take more pictures and put more things up for sale on the FB yardsale sites. 

I’ve been on an emotional roller coaster for months.  Today feels like more of a “calm” day (though it doesn’t seem to take much to change that).  There are those who think I shouuullld go to a doctor and get “something” for anxiety or stress or whatever.  With all that I’ve been through (DH’s many surgeries and hospitalisations, raising belligerent step sons, financial crunches, stressful jobs, etc) I’ve never resorted to that.  I can get through this too.  I think I’m a bit like DH was about pain meds .. I am not willing to risk becoming addicted or dependant.  Or maybe I just enjoy being grumpy.  But at my age, I have this fear that if I were to go to a doctor they’d find a dozen things “wrong” that require meds or treatments or such … just because they wouldn’t be able to accept a senior citizen not needing something.  And my take on that is .. maybe I have a few aches and pains; but the only major problem is the vision.  And if it ain’t broke, don’t “fix” it. 

It’s time for eye drops and then get the day going.