Day 82

Day 82

Wednesday, June 18, 2014

This was a much busier day, though I’m not really sure if it was exactly productive.  I guess every little thing accomplished is progress of sorts.

I wonder if my uneasy sleep patterns have to do with the heat .. but I don’t feel uncomfortably hot at night.  Yet, I do wake up with my neck pillow damp.  I don’t especially want to sleep with a fan going, but maybe I’ll try it again.  I won’t turn the a/c down …. It is already running way too much (even now, before daylight), and it’s set on 78.  So I’m feeling tried and draggy during the day … guess that’s making me grumpy too  Not to mention stressing about this whole move.  It’s So very hard to walk away from this house that I’ve loved for 13 years.  But there are just too many obstacles to overcome to stay.  When things unexpectedly fall into place, I just have to believe it was “meant to be”.  I even said that about the deposit .. if this is the right thing, the deposit will be there when I need it.  And it will.

My SIL did come yesterday, but not until 11:30.  Turns out, she probably shouldn’t have come at all .. I think stubbornness runs in that family along with poor health.  (her cardiologist had told her to not go out in the heat, and not drive.  I’m willing to bet he told her to not smoke too, though of course she didn’t tell me that).  Anyway, I gave her some things I had put back; and forgot a few.  She went through a shelf of books, and was very happy to take a LOT of books home with her.  It always makes me happy when someone is pleased to give my books new homes.  But there are SO many left!

While SIL was here, the lady called that wanted to buy the tall cabinets.  She couldn’t find my house (turns out my directions were fine; but I have no concept of distances).  Again, it was “meant to be” … because at nearly any other time I would have been here alone.  But SIL was able to take me up to the nearby community and then the lady could follow us back to the house.  She did buy the cabinets, and seemed very pleased with them.  She should be .. she got a great bargain!!

After she left, SIL went on home.  Not too long, maybe an hour, later TGF came over.  With NO boxes.  What was she thinking???  I do not understand how anyone expects me to be able to move when I have no way to pack.  And if this is some weird plan to force me to get rid of every single thing I own … not gonna work!!!    She started to say she’d just load the things “loose” in the car  … until she saw how much stuff I’ve actually managed to put aside.  She will come back today with boxes .. and boys.  While she was here, she finished going through another bookshelf, so more books out.  There are still a lot she wants for her classroom, but can’t take those yet.  I need her to start consolidating them on one of the shelves I’m giving her, so they don’t get dumped in with library donations.  She had mentioned that last year clothes on hangers sold well,  so I looked in the closet again.  I just recently donated a massive amount of clothes, so didn’t expect to find much.  But in the end, I did find an armful I could let go of.  Funny part is, some of them (things I wore a lot when I worked, but haven’t worn since I retired) she picked out to try on herself.  Well, they’ll be suitable for a teacher, she’s welcome to them.  I also pulled out a couple of blankets.  I wonder why it’s so hard for me to let go of blankets? 

I also cleaned out a small plastic crawer where I’ve always kept makeup.  It’s hard to wear makeup when you can’t see your face to put it on.  And I have a horror of looking like a clown. L  So the majority of that went into the trash … nothing there less than a year old anyway.  I finished cleaning out the last drawer on my big dresser.  And, since I’m not sure about closet space (I know I get 2 closets .. but I susect the 2 together won’t be any bigger than one of the 2 I have now!) I took a bunch of T-shirts and folded into the drawers.

It’s all progress … but only small things.  I’ve been terrified to even start in the kitchen.  It’s so dark and dreary in there; and now with the big cabinet gone, and 2 small ones emptied … way too much stuff is piled on the table.  I won’t use the tiny amount of counter space, because I’m afraid there are ants that I can’t see.  It’s like the hateful things *knew* the minute I had to cancel the exterminator!

I don’t really know what today will bring.  Supposedly this afternoon a massive amount of stuff will be taken to go to the “301 Endlses Yardsale”.  The big question: will I actually make any money?  And will they return the things I’m letting them take to sell but NOT willing to donate if they don’t sell?  I don’t think it’s up to someone else to make that decision for me.  And it’s much too early in the morning to be “borrowing” trouble!  I guess I’ll just go on and get showered and dressed,  and see where the day goes.