(Sunday and) Monday September 30, 2013
Physical:
Sunday he was up by around 8:30. He stayed in the chair all day, with only a bit of restlessness. Monday he was awake early, but I insisted he stay in bed a bit longer. The PD nurse came by to draw labs (check hemoglobin). After she left, I got him up. In the early afternoon the CNA came to get him bathed, and he stayed in bed for a few hours after that. He then got back up and spent a few hours up before going to bed.
He ate exceptionally well on Sunday (but woke once during the night saying he didn't feel good - I wonder if that's because of eating well but not having any Protonix for nearly a week?). He didn't eat lunch Monday, but ate a good supper.
Monday evening he started tipping the lift chair forward. He said he was trying to get comfortable. Sadly, I do know what he means - the chair has a bit of a tendancy to tip you forward. He said he was just going to get up and go over to the sofa and lay down. Once of these days he'll try something like that when I don't catch him - and he'll be on the floor again. I'm not sure if the confusion is less - or if we just avoid conversations that make it clear that his mind is somewhere else. At least there haven't been any recent "extreme" mind trips.
People:
As mentioned, the PD nurse came by early. The supply delivery was mid morning. Then the CMA came. After that the afternoon was quiet.
Emotions:
I find myself doing just what I fuss at him for doing - sleeping too much in the daytime, and not sleeping at night. I have always had this problem - once I've gotten *some* sleep, it's extremely hard to get back to sleep. Monday night, after getting him his last pills, I sat down to watch a program. I never saw a bit of it - I woke up to find the program and the news over. I turned it off, went back to sleep. At some point the alarm went off (I think he rolled over on the tubing, but not sure). I got back to sleep after that too. But by 4:00, I was awake. Instead of "tossing and turning", I just got up. I did laundry, mopped the kitchen - several of the things I haven't been getting done lately. Hopefully I'll have a bit of computer time and get a shower before he's ready to wake up.. I plan to try very hard today to work on things I need to get done, and try to limit the napping. By early afternoon I get so tired I can't function; but if I can push past that, maybe I can get back to a more realistic sleep pattern.
I still alternate between trying to stay busy and weepy depression. It's not helping that everything is getting harder and harder to do with my vision seeming to get worse nearly daily.
Tuesday, October 1, 2013
Sunday, September 29, 2013
Day 127
(Friday and) Saturday September 28, 2013
Physical: The most noteable thing this whole week has been the sleep/wake patterns. Saturday, he got up around 10:30. He sat in his chair watchng random TV. Around 1:00 or thereabouts he said he needed to use the commode. One of his problems (is it relaated to the dementia?) is that he actually can't tell when he needs to go. So, upon gtting him onto the commode, we discovered it was already too late (but he was not done eitehr). To avoid TMI, suffice to say I had a lot of less than pleasant clean up to take care of. He seems to vary between constipation and border-line diarhea.
At that point he decided he needed to lay down awhile. He went to sleep, and slept extremely soundly - for TEN hours! I couldn't get him to wake up for anything. But about 12:30 or so, he was wide awake, wanted to eat, wanted to use the commode, thought it was time to get up. The dialysis was going so he couldn't get up. I got him food, helped him on and off the commode (and cleaned up everything again). Then I sat up with him until around 3:00 AM. Well, I was in and out - turned the TV on. He finally went back to sleep, and I settled in my chair for a few hours.
People:
On Friday his cousin came to visit again. She brought us a gorgeous mum. I dearly love mums - usually I go to a nursery out on Old Stage Rd and get a bunch in different colors (but I'm partial to the bright yellow). I won't be able to this year, so I'm very happy for the one she brought.
The aide also came on Friday. Otherwise there has been no one here.At times it's very lonely; but I am grateful to not have the neighbors barging in.
Emotions:
The good thing is that I'm mostly too tired to *feel* anything. I cry a lot - but that's a combination of tiredness and my eyes bothering me as much as just sadness.
Physical: The most noteable thing this whole week has been the sleep/wake patterns. Saturday, he got up around 10:30. He sat in his chair watchng random TV. Around 1:00 or thereabouts he said he needed to use the commode. One of his problems (is it relaated to the dementia?) is that he actually can't tell when he needs to go. So, upon gtting him onto the commode, we discovered it was already too late (but he was not done eitehr). To avoid TMI, suffice to say I had a lot of less than pleasant clean up to take care of. He seems to vary between constipation and border-line diarhea.
At that point he decided he needed to lay down awhile. He went to sleep, and slept extremely soundly - for TEN hours! I couldn't get him to wake up for anything. But about 12:30 or so, he was wide awake, wanted to eat, wanted to use the commode, thought it was time to get up. The dialysis was going so he couldn't get up. I got him food, helped him on and off the commode (and cleaned up everything again). Then I sat up with him until around 3:00 AM. Well, I was in and out - turned the TV on. He finally went back to sleep, and I settled in my chair for a few hours.
People:
On Friday his cousin came to visit again. She brought us a gorgeous mum. I dearly love mums - usually I go to a nursery out on Old Stage Rd and get a bunch in different colors (but I'm partial to the bright yellow). I won't be able to this year, so I'm very happy for the one she brought.
The aide also came on Friday. Otherwise there has been no one here.At times it's very lonely; but I am grateful to not have the neighbors barging in.
Emotions:
The good thing is that I'm mostly too tired to *feel* anything. I cry a lot - but that's a combination of tiredness and my eyes bothering me as much as just sadness.
Friday, September 27, 2013
Day 125
Thursday September 26, 2013
P\Physical:
As always, I see no noticeable physical change. He seemed to be more sleepy - but there are many days like that. Because of the dialysis issue, he stayed in bed until after 3:00. Part of the time he sat up and watched TV, but then napped more. He also sat up for visiting. He *almost* seemed "normal", thinking wise. And then out of the blue said something that didn't make sense. In the evening he got so sleepy again I could barely wake him up to eat (and that was in his recliner, not in bed). But, he actually slept through the night. I know better than to hope we've hit on a good system; but we're closer anyway.
People:
The chaplain came by. He's an awfully nice young man. He's clearly very good at what he does - he listens. And unlike the nurses (whether they mean to or not), he never makes us feel like he's got to hurry off to another patient.
DSS came by in the late afternoon to do the heparin; also to park a car (with Mule Days in town, it wouldn't be safe!)
Emotions:
Even with less sleep than I would have liked, I was better until late afternoon. Then I completely ran out of steam, and had a really hard time pushing myself to cook some supper and get the night's dialysis set up. I had really wanted to watch Elementary - but not only never saw the end of it, I woke up briefly much later to find only the "Dish" symble (meaning it had been on a really long time and Dish seems to think we have no right to just put it on one channel and leave it, so they decide we're not watching any more).
When the chaplain was here, I gave him 2 devotion books I had. I'd enjoyed them, but can no longer read them and thought he might be able to share (he likes to read passages). He opened one and picked something completely at random - and it was so perfect it tok my breath away. It was about "I want to be 5 again, just for an hour". The gist of it was wanting to be held and taken care of. I don't want to be 5 (at that time I had a younger brother and infant sister, and was expected to be a "big girl" already). But nobody takes care of the caretaker. I'm here alone with DH the vast majority of the time. People are in and out, whenever it suits their schedules. My DIL was very thoughtful about letting me get a "day off" last spring. And they did find days to come visit during the summer. Now that school has started, they're too busy to even pick up the phone or send an email. TGF has a job, classes, 3 boys, plus DSS, their home, his business. She has NO time for anything else (except when it's to her benefit of course). Really, everyone has their own life. I don't blame them for that. I certainly don't expect anyone to put their life on hold just because I'm whining. But it does hurt that the ones who *should* care don't seem to.
And hugs. Oh God how I miss hugs. There is no physical contact in my world. Well, except hefting DH up and down. Somehow that's just not quite the same! I married into a family of mostly touch-me-nots. I have a brother, a brother-in-law, and a grandson who are really good huggers; and they're the ones I see the least.
I know I need to just get over myself. It is what it is, and complaining about it is not going to change anything. If I can just get to the point of not being so tired, I'll be OK. Last night (it's now Friday morning) was better. Even though I woke up shortly after 4:00, I still got over 5 hours sleep; and I think I dozed maybe an hour or so more after that. I've learned to just give in and allow myself to rest/doze in the afternoon. And I know I am less depressed when I feel like I've accomplished things during the day. - which of course I can't do if I'm so tired I don't care!
So, today will be better.
P\Physical:
As always, I see no noticeable physical change. He seemed to be more sleepy - but there are many days like that. Because of the dialysis issue, he stayed in bed until after 3:00. Part of the time he sat up and watched TV, but then napped more. He also sat up for visiting. He *almost* seemed "normal", thinking wise. And then out of the blue said something that didn't make sense. In the evening he got so sleepy again I could barely wake him up to eat (and that was in his recliner, not in bed). But, he actually slept through the night. I know better than to hope we've hit on a good system; but we're closer anyway.
People:
The chaplain came by. He's an awfully nice young man. He's clearly very good at what he does - he listens. And unlike the nurses (whether they mean to or not), he never makes us feel like he's got to hurry off to another patient.
DSS came by in the late afternoon to do the heparin; also to park a car (with Mule Days in town, it wouldn't be safe!)
Emotions:
Even with less sleep than I would have liked, I was better until late afternoon. Then I completely ran out of steam, and had a really hard time pushing myself to cook some supper and get the night's dialysis set up. I had really wanted to watch Elementary - but not only never saw the end of it, I woke up briefly much later to find only the "Dish" symble (meaning it had been on a really long time and Dish seems to think we have no right to just put it on one channel and leave it, so they decide we're not watching any more).
When the chaplain was here, I gave him 2 devotion books I had. I'd enjoyed them, but can no longer read them and thought he might be able to share (he likes to read passages). He opened one and picked something completely at random - and it was so perfect it tok my breath away. It was about "I want to be 5 again, just for an hour". The gist of it was wanting to be held and taken care of. I don't want to be 5 (at that time I had a younger brother and infant sister, and was expected to be a "big girl" already). But nobody takes care of the caretaker. I'm here alone with DH the vast majority of the time. People are in and out, whenever it suits their schedules. My DIL was very thoughtful about letting me get a "day off" last spring. And they did find days to come visit during the summer. Now that school has started, they're too busy to even pick up the phone or send an email. TGF has a job, classes, 3 boys, plus DSS, their home, his business. She has NO time for anything else (except when it's to her benefit of course). Really, everyone has their own life. I don't blame them for that. I certainly don't expect anyone to put their life on hold just because I'm whining. But it does hurt that the ones who *should* care don't seem to.
And hugs. Oh God how I miss hugs. There is no physical contact in my world. Well, except hefting DH up and down. Somehow that's just not quite the same! I married into a family of mostly touch-me-nots. I have a brother, a brother-in-law, and a grandson who are really good huggers; and they're the ones I see the least.
I know I need to just get over myself. It is what it is, and complaining about it is not going to change anything. If I can just get to the point of not being so tired, I'll be OK. Last night (it's now Friday morning) was better. Even though I woke up shortly after 4:00, I still got over 5 hours sleep; and I think I dozed maybe an hour or so more after that. I've learned to just give in and allow myself to rest/doze in the afternoon. And I know I am less depressed when I feel like I've accomplished things during the day. - which of course I can't do if I'm so tired I don't care!
So, today will be better.
Thursday, September 26, 2013
Day 124
Wednesday September 25, 2013
\Physical:
Although DH again was wanting to get up "early" (9:00 this time), within a short time he was ready to lay back down. He did have a morning of unusual clarity - when asked, he knew exactlywhere he was and that is it "home". Of course, he then proceeded to tell about some place we went yesterday (which, of course, only happened in his head). His B/P and sats were actually very good.
The dialysis from the night before messed up, but I didn't realize it until after he was up. I didn't figure out what the problem was until time to try to set things up. The machine had changed a setting - it's an area I never touch, so no way it was done "accidently". I had to have help getting it back to the proper setting; but whenever turning the machine on, instead of going straight to the start up screen, it's going to the USB screen and I have to check the settings. I will HAVE to have the machine replaced.
Trying to get dialysis gong was a complete nightmare. The first time it kept trying to drain for a long time; I finally decided that the screwed up exchange from last night had not left a "dwell" so there was nothing to drain. I bypassed, but as soon as the fill started he was saying he was in pain, to stop it. I bypassed and went to dwell, then skipped that back to drain again. It drained this time; but when it went to "fill", the machine absolutely refused to work. I checked all the lines, the clamps, everything there is to check. But the machine simply wasn't pumping (could tell because the fluid is warmed, and the tubing was still cold). By then it was nearly midnight, and I'd still not had any sleep. So I turned it off; and started over again this morning (Thursday). Don't know yet if it's going to work; but at least he's sleeping soundly.
People:
When it rains it pours! The nurse came, fairly early - so glad I had gotten an early start! The social worker also came. Turns out it was time for his re-evaluation. It's sort of ironic that of all days, everything was "good". But they didn't even hint that he could be removed from hospice - which would of course be a complete disaster! Not long after they left the aide got here. While she was here I tried to just sit and rest some - having had NO sleep the night before. He laid down during the afternoon but didn't really nap much. I dozed off and on; but every time I would nod off, the phone would ring. Even the doorbell once - little girl from next door wanted to know if I had an old lunchbox she could have. But the only one I had was just plain blue, and she wanted something "girly". I pointed out to her that I had all boys - I never get much that's "girly"! DSS also came later. I had told him it was OK to park a car in our yard. It's one he's trying to sell and he's afraid if he leaves it in town it will get damaged over the weekend (Mule Days). He was able to help me with getting the machine settings back where they belong. He also wrote down the phone # so I can call them, which I will do today.
Emotions:
As always, I'm so tired that everything is becming overwhelming. The nurse and social worker were asking if I had any "help". No, I don't. But really, if we can just get the dialysis back right (first problems we've had in a very long time; and it probably is time for a new machine anyway). and get DH to sleep through the night, I'd be able to manage. It's very frustrating to not be able to see what I'm doing, and not be able to go anywhere. I don't like having to depend on DSS's girlfriend - even though I'm sort of paying them (helping with storage), she's still not overly concerned with what I need. She did stop by the grocery store yesterday (oh yeah, forgot that, one more person stopping by). She only got a few basics - about $15 worth, and I gave her $20. Pretty good "tip" I'd say! I really need to get the new reading glasses - I don't even know how much good they will do, but it can't be worse. But since the only time the girlfriend can manage to spare me aany time is on Sunday (yesterday she was here less than 15 minutes - only came by because she had to pick up the boys at the school only 3 miles away anyway) No eyeglass places are open on Sunday (and the only place remotely near that is affordable (no insurance) is Wal-Mart.
As tired as I was, by the time I gave up on the dialysis last night I was beyond sleep; so I mopped the kitchen floor. He woke up around 4:30, wanated to get up to pee. But he did go on back to sleep after that. I got the kitchen put back together, dried and folded a load of laundry; then got about another hour of sleep.
I'm still tired today, but not quite as bad as yesterday. I'm still struggling with overwhelming sadness .. not even sure if it's because of exhaustion, depression, or what. Maybe today will be better.
\Physical:
Although DH again was wanting to get up "early" (9:00 this time), within a short time he was ready to lay back down. He did have a morning of unusual clarity - when asked, he knew exactlywhere he was and that is it "home". Of course, he then proceeded to tell about some place we went yesterday (which, of course, only happened in his head). His B/P and sats were actually very good.
The dialysis from the night before messed up, but I didn't realize it until after he was up. I didn't figure out what the problem was until time to try to set things up. The machine had changed a setting - it's an area I never touch, so no way it was done "accidently". I had to have help getting it back to the proper setting; but whenever turning the machine on, instead of going straight to the start up screen, it's going to the USB screen and I have to check the settings. I will HAVE to have the machine replaced.
Trying to get dialysis gong was a complete nightmare. The first time it kept trying to drain for a long time; I finally decided that the screwed up exchange from last night had not left a "dwell" so there was nothing to drain. I bypassed, but as soon as the fill started he was saying he was in pain, to stop it. I bypassed and went to dwell, then skipped that back to drain again. It drained this time; but when it went to "fill", the machine absolutely refused to work. I checked all the lines, the clamps, everything there is to check. But the machine simply wasn't pumping (could tell because the fluid is warmed, and the tubing was still cold). By then it was nearly midnight, and I'd still not had any sleep. So I turned it off; and started over again this morning (Thursday). Don't know yet if it's going to work; but at least he's sleeping soundly.
People:
When it rains it pours! The nurse came, fairly early - so glad I had gotten an early start! The social worker also came. Turns out it was time for his re-evaluation. It's sort of ironic that of all days, everything was "good". But they didn't even hint that he could be removed from hospice - which would of course be a complete disaster! Not long after they left the aide got here. While she was here I tried to just sit and rest some - having had NO sleep the night before. He laid down during the afternoon but didn't really nap much. I dozed off and on; but every time I would nod off, the phone would ring. Even the doorbell once - little girl from next door wanted to know if I had an old lunchbox she could have. But the only one I had was just plain blue, and she wanted something "girly". I pointed out to her that I had all boys - I never get much that's "girly"! DSS also came later. I had told him it was OK to park a car in our yard. It's one he's trying to sell and he's afraid if he leaves it in town it will get damaged over the weekend (Mule Days). He was able to help me with getting the machine settings back where they belong. He also wrote down the phone # so I can call them, which I will do today.
Emotions:
As always, I'm so tired that everything is becming overwhelming. The nurse and social worker were asking if I had any "help". No, I don't. But really, if we can just get the dialysis back right (first problems we've had in a very long time; and it probably is time for a new machine anyway). and get DH to sleep through the night, I'd be able to manage. It's very frustrating to not be able to see what I'm doing, and not be able to go anywhere. I don't like having to depend on DSS's girlfriend - even though I'm sort of paying them (helping with storage), she's still not overly concerned with what I need. She did stop by the grocery store yesterday (oh yeah, forgot that, one more person stopping by). She only got a few basics - about $15 worth, and I gave her $20. Pretty good "tip" I'd say! I really need to get the new reading glasses - I don't even know how much good they will do, but it can't be worse. But since the only time the girlfriend can manage to spare me aany time is on Sunday (yesterday she was here less than 15 minutes - only came by because she had to pick up the boys at the school only 3 miles away anyway) No eyeglass places are open on Sunday (and the only place remotely near that is affordable (no insurance) is Wal-Mart.
As tired as I was, by the time I gave up on the dialysis last night I was beyond sleep; so I mopped the kitchen floor. He woke up around 4:30, wanated to get up to pee. But he did go on back to sleep after that. I got the kitchen put back together, dried and folded a load of laundry; then got about another hour of sleep.
I'm still tired today, but not quite as bad as yesterday. I'm still struggling with overwhelming sadness .. not even sure if it's because of exhaustion, depression, or what. Maybe today will be better.
Wednesday, September 25, 2013
Day 123
Tuesday Septembeer 24, 2013
Physical:
I still can't tell any difference in his brathing. At times he sounds like he's struggling other times he seems to breathe as normally as anyone else. The cough hasn't gotten noticeably worse that I can tell.
Mentally, he simply has no clue where he is any more. Ever. And he does know he's been told he's "home" - he just doesn't accept that.
But what scares me the most (and I'm sure I'm repeating myself - that's just an indication of how much the problem disturbs me) - is his not being able to realize what he can or can't do. Even when he has to ask me to help him sit up on the edge of the bed - he still doesn't realize that he can't just stand up and walk to where he wants to be.
The new sleeping pills seemed to work the first 2 nights - and then not. I don't know if it's how they work or what, but DH had a totally weird schedule. So last night (Tuesday) I did not give him one. The thing is, he was ready to get up at 8:30 in the morning; and then about 1:30 had to use the commode. (missed - huge mess for me to clean up). Then he laid down - and went very sound asleep. I tried multipole times from late afternoon into the evening to wake him. I had lights on, TV on, and the head of the bed raised - and the best I could get was a slurred mumble about "tired". But. About 11:00 - he woke up. And thought it made perfect sense for me to get him up to use the commode, and then wantd his supper. And then wanted me to sit up with him since he was wide awake. It was after 1:00 AM before he got drowsy enough that I could leave. He did sleep, though fitfully. How do I know? Because I could not get to sleep at all.
People:
No one came here. Not even my *friend* who keeps promising to come, and yet on 2 perfectly gorgeous days in a row she neither showed up nor bothered to contact me in any way. DSS called - although, oddly enough, his calls seem to be as much wanting to just talk to me about what's going on as they are asking how his dad is doing. DH's sister called - the one I don't like. Says she's coming to see him soon. I dread that, but can't tell her not to come.
Emotions:
Everyone keeps telling me that all these mental aberations are "normal", and "to be expected". No one tells me how to live with them. They say I should just go along. Well, how can I do that when he says "it's time to go home, his car is in the driveway". And I have no one to talk to at all but this stupid blog.
I never know when the nurse is coming - and lately, I don't even know which nurse is coming. The social worker and the chaplain had said they try to visit every 2 weeks or so .. but it's now been 3 weeks since they were here. The chaplain did at least ask if I get any "me" time. How can I? I'm "on duty" 24/7 - and not only that, DH's sleep/wake patterns seem to change daily, so I can't even try to carve out any time (have had to stop twice this morning even just writing this).
Physical:
I still can't tell any difference in his brathing. At times he sounds like he's struggling other times he seems to breathe as normally as anyone else. The cough hasn't gotten noticeably worse that I can tell.
Mentally, he simply has no clue where he is any more. Ever. And he does know he's been told he's "home" - he just doesn't accept that.
But what scares me the most (and I'm sure I'm repeating myself - that's just an indication of how much the problem disturbs me) - is his not being able to realize what he can or can't do. Even when he has to ask me to help him sit up on the edge of the bed - he still doesn't realize that he can't just stand up and walk to where he wants to be.
The new sleeping pills seemed to work the first 2 nights - and then not. I don't know if it's how they work or what, but DH had a totally weird schedule. So last night (Tuesday) I did not give him one. The thing is, he was ready to get up at 8:30 in the morning; and then about 1:30 had to use the commode. (missed - huge mess for me to clean up). Then he laid down - and went very sound asleep. I tried multipole times from late afternoon into the evening to wake him. I had lights on, TV on, and the head of the bed raised - and the best I could get was a slurred mumble about "tired". But. About 11:00 - he woke up. And thought it made perfect sense for me to get him up to use the commode, and then wantd his supper. And then wanted me to sit up with him since he was wide awake. It was after 1:00 AM before he got drowsy enough that I could leave. He did sleep, though fitfully. How do I know? Because I could not get to sleep at all.
People:
No one came here. Not even my *friend* who keeps promising to come, and yet on 2 perfectly gorgeous days in a row she neither showed up nor bothered to contact me in any way. DSS called - although, oddly enough, his calls seem to be as much wanting to just talk to me about what's going on as they are asking how his dad is doing. DH's sister called - the one I don't like. Says she's coming to see him soon. I dread that, but can't tell her not to come.
Emotions:
Everyone keeps telling me that all these mental aberations are "normal", and "to be expected". No one tells me how to live with them. They say I should just go along. Well, how can I do that when he says "it's time to go home, his car is in the driveway". And I have no one to talk to at all but this stupid blog.
I never know when the nurse is coming - and lately, I don't even know which nurse is coming. The social worker and the chaplain had said they try to visit every 2 weeks or so .. but it's now been 3 weeks since they were here. The chaplain did at least ask if I get any "me" time. How can I? I'm "on duty" 24/7 - and not only that, DH's sleep/wake patterns seem to change daily, so I can't even try to carve out any time (have had to stop twice this morning even just writing this).
Tuesday, September 24, 2013
Day 122
Monday September 23, 2013
We seem to have entered a new phase.It starts early (7:30 - 8:00) in the morning. He's decided to get up. Monday, he sat up until the aide got here. Then he stayed in bed from then on (1:30ish I think). He slept very soundly for several hours (when I tried to wake him at one point, he said "tired", very slurred). He woke up somewhat in the evening, and watched TV and ate some supper while I set up dialysis. By 8:30 or so he was sound asleep again.
And Tuesday morning (I always write in the morning for the day before) he's up again, with the added bonus that I get to clean him up.
So I no longer have my nice quiet time in the morning.
I feel like a non-person any more.
We seem to have entered a new phase.It starts early (7:30 - 8:00) in the morning. He's decided to get up. Monday, he sat up until the aide got here. Then he stayed in bed from then on (1:30ish I think). He slept very soundly for several hours (when I tried to wake him at one point, he said "tired", very slurred). He woke up somewhat in the evening, and watched TV and ate some supper while I set up dialysis. By 8:30 or so he was sound asleep again.
And Tuesday morning (I always write in the morning for the day before) he's up again, with the added bonus that I get to clean him up.
So I no longer have my nice quiet time in the morning.
I feel like a non-person any more.
Monday, September 23, 2013
Day 121
Sunday September 22, 2013
Physical:
For someone who hasn't the strength to stand alone, he certainly pulls off some amazing (and frightening) feats.
Sunday was a fairly good day. The dialysis was off, due to my negligance. But, it ran smoothly and I stopped it approximately half way. I got him up and dressed just as DSS got here, so DH ended up sitting in his chair around 6 hours. He also ate surprisngly well. He had a bowl of grapes and watermelon; then a small bag of Cheetos; then 2 grilled cheese sandwiches. He asked for a 3rd, but I told him dinner was in the works. He ate 2 (smallish) servings of meatloaf and mashed potatoes. By 7:30 he was starting to doze and exhausted, so I took him back to bed .. and by 8:00 he was sound asleep.
At 12:30ish he woke up. And, of course, so did I. He was sitting up (albeit holding on to the railings) with his feet hanging off the end of the bed where the railings stopped. Scared me good!! He had decided to get up and explore the room. I persuaded him to lay back down; and I know he slept at least off and on, if not soundly, until very early morning. I, of course, did not. :(
People
DSS and TGF and the 2 little boys came over. She helped me get my cell phone programmed; and also got a new cordless phone set up (old one was dieing, would no longer hold a charge). She forgot part of what she needed to cook so we went to the store and then grabbed some burgers for the kids (lunch). Naturallly, I paid for everything. Everything ran too late, so we didn't get the shopping done that we intended - which means we will run out of things before next
Emotions:
I'm weepy again; but that's at least in part because I'm tired again. At 4:30 I quit trying to sleep, and turned on the news, got some coffee, and did a bit of handwork on a sewing project. I tried to doze again around 5:30, but no luck. At 6:20 I gave up and got up, ; and another day has started.
Physical:
For someone who hasn't the strength to stand alone, he certainly pulls off some amazing (and frightening) feats.
Sunday was a fairly good day. The dialysis was off, due to my negligance. But, it ran smoothly and I stopped it approximately half way. I got him up and dressed just as DSS got here, so DH ended up sitting in his chair around 6 hours. He also ate surprisngly well. He had a bowl of grapes and watermelon; then a small bag of Cheetos; then 2 grilled cheese sandwiches. He asked for a 3rd, but I told him dinner was in the works. He ate 2 (smallish) servings of meatloaf and mashed potatoes. By 7:30 he was starting to doze and exhausted, so I took him back to bed .. and by 8:00 he was sound asleep.
At 12:30ish he woke up. And, of course, so did I. He was sitting up (albeit holding on to the railings) with his feet hanging off the end of the bed where the railings stopped. Scared me good!! He had decided to get up and explore the room. I persuaded him to lay back down; and I know he slept at least off and on, if not soundly, until very early morning. I, of course, did not. :(
People
DSS and TGF and the 2 little boys came over. She helped me get my cell phone programmed; and also got a new cordless phone set up (old one was dieing, would no longer hold a charge). She forgot part of what she needed to cook so we went to the store and then grabbed some burgers for the kids (lunch). Naturallly, I paid for everything. Everything ran too late, so we didn't get the shopping done that we intended - which means we will run out of things before next
Emotions:
I'm weepy again; but that's at least in part because I'm tired again. At 4:30 I quit trying to sleep, and turned on the news, got some coffee, and did a bit of handwork on a sewing project. I tried to doze again around 5:30, but no luck. At 6:20 I gave up and got up, ; and another day has started.
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